


all the way home i'll be warm

by antikytheras



Series: warm-up hogwash [3]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Christmas Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Slow Burn, chris gets introduced on chris-tmas hohoho illuminati confirmed, chris is a lil' bit of a shit but he doesn't really mean it, i've been informed that this should be tagged, phichit has no subtlety, pov goes between phichit viktor and yuuri, that's it that's the fic, they're all sweethearts really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 21:08:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9090856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antikytheras/pseuds/antikytheras
Summary: It takes Yuuri three Christmases (and one Phichit) to realise that Viktor has always spent his alone.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Q: why are their personalities a little different?  
> A: because I’m writing them like how I’d imagine 12/13/14/15 year olds would act. Their “canon-compliant” personalities will probably come in mostly around the fifth year :)
> 
> This is a little late but Merry Christmas everybody! Special shout-out to the twenty-one of you who unanimously voted for a hogwash xmas fic :’)

NIKIFOROV Case File #1

Date of Incident: November 24, first year

Time of Incident: 9pm

Location of Incident: Outside McGonagall’s office

Witnesses: Headmistress McGonagall, Two Cart(?), Amarach Rapier, Phichit Coolanont, Kris Jerk-o-matic(???)

Detailed incident report as follows.

\--

Phichit comes up with brilliant ideas.

Or at least, that’s what he insists when he ends up getting dragged to McGonagall’s office.

‘Hamsters totally count as rats!’ he wails melodramatically, clinging to the exasperated Hufflepuff prefect’s arm like deadweight.

Which he will be, if his dad finds out that he smuggled Thxng, Ngein and Brxns into Hogwarts.

‘Phichit, buddy, you’re great,’ Amarach assures him, resolutely continuing onward despite the first-year stubbornly digging his heels into the ground, ‘but I told you that I’m gonna need to report you to the Headmistress if I find a single hamster in the castle. Which I did. In my cat’s mouth.’

‘I thought Hufflepuffs were the nice ones!’ Phichit grumbles, futilely attempting to swipe Amarach’s satchel out of her hands. He can hear his precious babies chittering inside. ‘My hamsters are scared of the dark!’

‘Just cause you’re afraid of the dark doesn’t mean your hamsters are too,’ Amarach admonishes, then continues cheerfully, ‘Staircase coming up, by the way. Might wanna think about using your legs if you don’t want me to accidentally break them dragging you up.’

Phichit gulps and detaches himself from the deceptively sweet-looking fifth-year. Obediently, he falls in line behind her as they ascend, making way for a group of third-year Ravenclaws trooping down.

‘Curfew’s in an hour!’ Amarach reminds them sharply, nodding at the Ravenclaw prefect herding them downstairs.

‘What’s this, Ammy?’ the Ravenclaw prefect slows his step and grins, raising an eyebrow at Phichit.

‘A little trouble at home, that’s all,’ Amarach says vaguely, throwing a pitying look in Phichit’s general direction then turning back to the other prefect. ‘Do you happen to know if McGonagall’s in?’

‘Yeah, but she’s a little busy right now with you-know-what. You might have to wait a bit. Anyway, nice catching up but I gotta go make sure these nerds don’t end up locked in the library. Ciao.’ The Ravenclaw prefect waves, taking the stairs two at a time. Phichit’s a little jealous of his long legs.

‘Ciao,’ Amarach calls out to the prefect’s retreating shadow.

Phichit’s gossip radar is tingling. ‘What’s you-know-what?’ he asks, feigning innocent curiosity.

Unfortunately for him, Amarach has sharp eyes. ‘You’ll see,’ she hums vaguely. ‘You might even be one of the first few students to find out about the news.’

‘What news?’ Oh, he’s hooked.

‘You’ll find out if you follow me to the office and wait quietly. I need to explain your—’ Amarach breaks off and glances at the satchel in her hands with a sigh, ‘—little _situation_ to the Headmistress.’

‘If I’m good, does that mean I can keep my hamsters?’ Phichit asks hopefully. He’s _really_ not looking forward to the Howler in his future.

Amarach sighs again. She’s been doing that a lot. ‘If you promise to sit here and wait quietly while I explain things to Professor McGonagall, I’ll let you hold onto them.’

If that’s the best compromise Amarach has to offer, Phichit is royally _screwed_.

He snatches the satchel out of her hands before she even finishes her sentence. ‘My babies!’ he wails again, pulling the satchel open, revealing—

His hamsters are happily frolicking inside, completely unharmed. When he sticks a hand in to pull them out, he’s rewarded with a nip.

Traitors.

With the satchel inches from his face, he ends up walking straight into Amarach.

‘This is it,’ Amarach sighs, steadying Phichit.

He looks around. The door to the Headmistress’s office is obviously hewn from the same heavy stone as the grey walls of Hogwarts. He wonders if it’s enchanted to be light enough to open.

‘Wait here, okay? I’ll be right back.’ Amarach pats his head gently, then nudges the stone door open with one hand.

Phichit stares into the satchel again. Poor Thxng, Ngein and Brxns. They’ve got no idea what’s coming to them.

‘I wish I could be a hamster,’ he sighs forlornly. ‘Then I’d have nothing to worry about.’

After a minute, Amarach still hasn’t re-emerged. Phichit leans against the wall.

Another minute passes. By then he’s bored and sprawled on the floor, stroking Thxng’s soft golden fur.

Footsteps echo in the hallway. In the distance, he spots two Slytherins sauntering toward him, their hands jammed in their pockets.

‘—a Mudblood end up in Slytherin?’ Phichit hears one of them say, annoyed.

‘Maybe it was a mistake,’ the taller Slytherin suggests. They’re close enough for Phichit to make out the prefect’s badge gleaming on the taller Slytherin’s chest.

Were all the prefects having a party in the Headmistress’s office today or something?

‘Is that him?’ the shorter one asks, nodding at Phichit dismissively. ‘Looks like a Hufflepuff to me.’

‘Does he look Russian to you?’ the prefect snaps, shoving the shorter one forward.

Phichit presses himself to the wall, wishing that they’d just walk past him and leave him alone.

‘Oi, Hufflepuff,’ the shorter one calls out, striding right up to him.

Merlin’s underpants.

‘Yeah?’ Phichit replies warily, scooping his hamsters back into the safety of Amarach’s satchel.

‘Is Nikiforov in Hufflepuff or Slytherin?’ Phichit really doesn’t like the Slytherin’s haughty tone. He also really doesn’t like how he’s tapping his foot impatiently, like Phichit owes it to him to answer quickly.

‘Who?’ he asks, politely confused. The hamsters are safely behind him now.

The prefect scoffs. ‘He doesn’t know anything, Chris. He probably just got caught smuggling in Muggle pets.’

Phichit’s entire back is pressed against the brick wall as he slowly rises, his precious pets stowed away in a pocket.

Chris shrugs. ‘Worth a shot. Even if Hufflepuffs are the useless rejects, at least they’ve got brains, not like those overgrown Gryffindors.’

‘That’s not very nice,’ Phichit murmurs, reaching for his wand. He’s glad he remembered to grab it before he left the dorms to chase after Amarach.

He sees Chris’s hand disappear into another pocket.

The Slytherin prefect looks away, suddenly gaining an acute interest in the architecture outside the Headmistress’s office.

Phichit slips his wand out—

The door slams open with a bang.

Amarach storms out and snaps at Phichit, ‘Five points from Hufflepuff. What kind of Hufflepuff starts a fight?’

Phichit raises his arms in surrender but protests, pointing at Chris, ‘I didn’t! He said—’

To Phichit’s surprise, the Slytherin prefect murmurs, ‘Five points from Slytherin.’

He sees Amarach’s head jerk toward the prefect. He inclines his head, his black eyes meeting hers steadily. ‘Giacometti issued an unprovoked insult.’

‘Thank you,’ she says stiffly.

‘Slytherins don’t always fight dirty,’ is his enigmatic reply.

She eyes him appraisingly for a long moment, then shakes her head and moves aside, gesturing toward the door. ‘Viktor’s waiting.’

‘So he’s really a Slytherin?’ Chris growls, but the Slytherin prefect clamps down one hand on his shoulder and he forcibly relaxes.

Amarach is blatantly unruffled by the feisty first-year. She shrugs. ‘Looks like it. He seems like he’d make a good Hufflepuff though,’ she sighs.

Before anyone can reply, the office door opens again and the Headmistress emerges, black robes billowing. ‘What is this ruckus?’ Professor McGonagall admonishes sternly with a frown. ‘Rapier, Ducarte, explain yourselves.’

‘We were confused about Nikiforov’s House,’ Ducarte, the Slytherin prefect, explains smoothly with a bow. ‘Our tempers got a little out of hand.’

‘He’s been Sorted into Slytherin. What is there to be confused about, Ducarte?’

Phichit gulps.

Ducarte dodges her loaded question with a fair amount of grace. ‘Nothing, professor. It’s just that I heard from Amarach here that he seemed more suited to be a Hufflepuff.’

‘Keep your prefects’ gossip to yourselves, then. I want you to make sure Nikiforov assimilates well, and your loose tongues won’t help.’ Professor McGonagall chides, massaging her temples.

Ducarte bows again. ‘Yes, professor. Shall I fetch him?’

‘Go with Rapier. I must speak to Giacometti about his duties.’ She waves them off. The prefects bow and exit the room briskly.

Chris looks about two shades paler than he did earlier. ‘Yes, Headmistress?’

‘Please ensure that Nikiforov is treated as an equal student in this school. Until he adjusts, you will be assigned to be his roommate and I expect you to ensure that he knows his way around. He will be spending Christmas break in school, and you have no obligation to stay with him. I understand that your family has already made arrangements for you,’ Professor McGonagall frowns very slightly, ‘so I suppose it can’t be helped.’

‘Understood, Headmistress.’ Chris awkwardly bows. ‘I’ll take care of him.’

‘Very good. And Chulanont,’ she turns to face Phichit, ‘Rapier has spoken to me about your “rats” and she proposes a rather novel solution. If you can successfully Transfigure your hamsters into rats for a full week, I will note it as an excellent academic achievement meriting special arrangements for your “rats.”’

‘Yes Professor!’ Phichit almost cries in relief.

‘You have the next two weeks to show me the results. Don’t fail me, Chulanont.’

For the third time in five minutes, the office door swings open again.

This time, a silver-haired boy steps out with a huge smile on his face. He’s dressed in worn robes two sizes too big for him. His vividly blue eyes meet Phichit’s and he immediately zooms toward him.

‘Are you Christophe? I’m Viktor!’ he happily chirps. He’s _way_ inside Phichit’s personal space.

Is this really a Slytherin? ‘I— Er—’ Flabbergasted, Phichit wildly gesticulates toward Chris’s general direction. ‘That one, there—’

‘Oops, sorry.’ Phichit can’t even imagine the last time he thought a Slytherin would say sorry. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots Ducarte and Amarach emerge from the office with equally overwhelmed expressions.

It’s not just him, then.

Evidently, Viktor’s moved on to his next target. ‘Tell me about the things!’ he demands, ‘Magic! Hogwarts! Britain!’ Are his eyes _sparkling_?

Christophe looks like he’s about to faint. If he hadn’t insulted Phichit just minutes ago, Phichit would’ve felt a little sorry for him. ‘Okay, pretty boy, slow down.’

Viktor laughs and scratches his head bashfully. ‘Sorry! I’m just really excited! I haven’t been outside of Russia—’

‘You’re Russian?’ Phichit blurts out, then covers his mouth with a horrified expression.

Professor McGonagall doesn’t even bother trying to conceal her amusement. ‘I’ll leave you to it, then. Curfew’s in half an hour, I don’t want to send any of you to detention, especially not on his first day.’ With that threat hanging over their heads, she returns to her office.

‘Do you really celebrate Christmas?’ Viktor’s mouth is running about a mile a minute.

‘Yeah, it’s a break for us, we get to go home for the holidays.’ Chris looks like he’s just about given up trying to follow Viktor’s mind.

‘Wow! We don’t really celebrate Christmas in Russia—’

While Viktor chatters on, Amarach pulls Phichit aside.

‘I did what I could,’ she shrugs, eyeing her satchel. ‘Do your best, kiddo.’

‘Are all Russians like that,’ is all Phichit manages to stammer out.

For some reason, Amarach’s expression seems clouded. ‘I don’t know. We’ll see.’ She shakes her head, and the sorrow clears from her face. ‘Anyway, get back to the dorms. McGonagall might confiscate your “rats” if you get yourself in detention.’

Phichit holds on to his hamsters tightly and _runs_.

\--

NIKIFOROV Case File #419

Date of Incident: December 7, second year

Time of Incident: 8am

Location of Incident: Great Hall

Witnesses: Yuuri Katsuki, Phichu, the whole of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff too, everyone in Slytherin and their mother, wouldn’t be surprised if Ravenclaw saw it too

Detailed incident report as follows.

\--

‘Viktor!’ Phichit yells, giggling as he runs up to the second-year.

He does his best not to shrink under the heavy gazes of every Slytherin sitting in the Great Hall.

Thankfully, Viktor slips off his seat and runs toward Phichit too. They end up meeting closer to the Hufflepuff table. ‘Phichit! Are you giving me more food?’

Sometimes, Phichit can’t tell if Viktor is really dense or just really good at acting dumb. There’s no way he can’t spot the giant gift box badly hidden behind Phichit’s back.

He lets it slide. ‘It’s even better!’ Phichit grins. ‘Tada!’ He whips out the box and pushes it into Viktor’s outstretched hands.

‘What’s this?’ Viktor tilts his head, turning the box over. ‘For me?’

‘Yeah! Happy birthday and Merry Christmas! It’s from me and Yuuri. Yuuri wanted to be the first one to get you a birthday present so we were figuring out how to give it to you before your fanclub so we thought we’d just give it to you as early as we could.’ Phichit nods to himself proudly.

‘Oh! Thank you! Where’s Yuuri?’ Viktor’s already torn his attention off Phichit. As usual, it’s entirely devoted to the Gryffindor.

‘He’s sick. Someone accidentally got him expired Every Flavour Beans for his birthday,’ Phichit tuts.

Once Viktor’s finished scanning the Gryffindor table, he looks back at Phichit with a frown. It’s rare to see the Slytherin without a smile.

‘I think that might’ve been Chris,’ he mumbles sheepishly. ‘Sorry. He’s usually not this careless. I’ll yell at him later.’

‘It’s okay,’ Phichit smiles. ‘But Yuuri wanted me to make you promise not to open it until your actual birthday!’

Viktor’s usual countenance returns. ‘What?’ he whines. ‘That’s awful!’

Sometimes, Phichit swears that Yuuri’s cunning enough to be a Slytherin. ‘He told me to tell you that it’s only fair, since he’s currently throwing up everything he eats.’

Suddenly, Viktor’s grabbing Phichit’s hand and pulling him out of the Great Hall. ‘We’re gonna get to the bottom of this! Let’s go visit him.’

‘Wait,’ Phichit protests, ‘I thought we’re not allowed to visit other Houses’ dormitories?’

‘I do it all the time! C’mon.’

And that’s how they end up outside the Gryffindor common room.

‘Wimple-dimple,’ Viktor says to the portrait, which doesn’t even make a remark as it swings open.

The Gryffindors on the other side stare at Viktor as he passes them with Phichit in tow. Phichit’s sure that he’d stare, too.

‘Sorry,’ Phichit mumbles, but they just shrug and let them go.

‘Yuuko! Is Yuuri okay?’ Viktor calls out. Phichit wonders how Viktor’s already on a first-name basis with every random Gryffindor that passes.

‘Viktor, I’m fine,’ mumbles a couch in a corner.

Phichit frowns. He sounds awful.

Viktor releases Phichit’s hand and walks forward briskly. ‘Yuuri? You look awful. Shouldn’t you be in the sick bay?’

Yuuko sighs and continues to mumble a spell under her breath, slowly draining Yuuri’s vomit bucket. Once it’s emptied to her satisfaction, she turns and implores Viktor, ‘Drag him to Madam Pomfrey’s office before I Leviosa him there myself.’

‘I’m fine, just need a nap,’ Yuuri slurs. Phichit reaches the corner and stares. He really looks awful.

‘Yuuri, you need a professional.’ Viktor’s face is pale. If Phichit didn’t know the ever-cheerful Viktor any better, he’d say the Slytherin looked downright _pissed_. ‘I think Chris accidentally gave you his prank box. Those beans weren’t expired, they were _hexed_.’

‘They were _delicious_ ,’ Yuuri mumbles deliriously.

‘Phichit, hold on to that bucket. Yuuko, you haven’t eaten, right?’ Yuuko nods tiredly. She looks as if she’d been up all night. ‘Go get breakfast, we’ve had ours already. We’ll bring him to Madam Pomfrey.’ Viktor shoots out orders like a field commander and brings out his wand, pointing it at Yuuri’s prone form and mumbling under his breath. He stows his wand and picks Yuuri up like he weighs about as much as a sack of feathers.

Phichit grabs the bucket and follows behind.

He can hear Yuuri mumbling, ‘Did you like your present?’

Viktor’s voice is warm as he manoeuvres Yuuri’s legs out of the portrait-hole. ‘Yeah. I’m really happy. Thank you.’

‘You can’t open it til your birthday, okay? Promise.’

The Slytherin doesn’t even put up a fight. ‘Promise.’

‘What are you gonna do for your birthday?’ Yuuri asks. Phichit doesn’t think he knows what he’s saying. In fact, he’s never heard Yuuri this mindlessly talkative before.

‘Hang out in the castle, do homework. The usual.’ Viktor carefully cradles his head as they descend a flight of stairs.

‘What about Christmas?’

Yuuri is definitely out of his mind.

Viktor only laughs quietly. ‘My birthday’s on Christmas, silly.’

‘Oh. What do you want for Christmas, then?’

‘I want you to be not-sick,’ Viktor replies, completely serious.

Yuuri laughs a little, then ends up clapping his hands over his mouth. Phichit quickly runs forward with the bucket.

Yuuri hurls. It’s not a pretty sight.

‘We’re almost there,’ Phichit mumbles. Yuuri nods weakly.

‘Who do you spend Christmas with, Phichit?’ his voice is hoarse. His throat must be dying.

‘You should stop talking, Yuuri.’ Phichit chastises him, flicking his forehead. ‘I spend it with my dad and mum.’

‘Me too,’ he mumbles, nestling himself into Viktor’s shoulder. ‘What about you?’

Viktor says nothing and strokes Yuuri’s hair, shushing him to sleep. ‘Don’t hurt your throat,’ he says instead.

Yuuri obediently falls silent and soon, Phichit spots the tell-tale measured rise and fall of his chest.

Later, Madam Pomfrey interrogates them and Viktor ends up taking the fall for Chris. He spends the next week in detention.

Yuuri, of course, remembers nothing of their conversation.

\--

NIKIFOROV Case File #994

Date of Incident: December 25, third year

Time of Incident: 12.03am

Location of Incident: Online

Witnesses: Phichit Chulanont

Detailed incident report as follows.

\--

Phichit lounges on the sofa, rubbing his stomach as he scrolls through Twitter. Christmas dinners always make him feel so full.

He feels Thxng clambering onto his shoulder and switches to his camera application. With his other hand, he musses up his hair. After testing out multiple selfie angles, he finally takes a shot he’s happy with.

He captions it ‘Merry Christmas!!’ and adds a slew of Christmas emojis after.

‘Phichit, are you ready to open presents?’ his mother asks.

‘Coming! Let me just finish this first,’ Phichit says, scheduling his selfie to post the second it turns Christmas, time zones be damned. With a loud groan, he rolls himself off the sofa and crashes into his father’s legs.

‘Sorry!’ he yelps, disentangling himself.

His dad laughs heartily and pulls him up by the armpits. ‘It’s fine. Christmas dinners make me turn into a barrel too.’ He pats his stomach contentedly.

Phichit’s mother plonks a rectangular box in front of him. ‘Here you go, Phi. It’s from me and your dad.’

Phichit keeps a careful eye on the clock. ‘Twenty more seconds!’ he insists.

She laughs warmly and holds him in a tight hug. ‘Okay, okay. Should we count down, then?’

Phichit nods with a grin. ‘Yeah! Five, four, three—’

His dad joins in, love shining in his eyes. ‘Two, one! Merry Christmas, Phichit!’

‘Merry Christmas dad, merry Christmas mum!’ he yells, then he turns his attention to the main attraction of the night.

Phichit rips the wrapping paper open and squeals.

‘A selfie stick! Thanks so much! I love it! I can bring this to Hogwarts, right?’ he asks, turning to his dad.

His dad rolls his eyes. ‘Oh, so now you ask me for permission? You don’t need my permission for hamsters, but you need it for a stick?’

‘Dad, that was two years ago,’ Phichit whines.

‘I know, I know,’ he laughs, ‘I’m only teasing. Yes, you can bring it so long as you don’t smack that Christophe boy with it. I don’t want to hear about you getting into any fights next year, you hear?’

‘I’ll be a good Hufflepuff!’ Phichit promises.

His phone chimes. He almost puts it aside, until he recognises Viktor’s number.

_Merry shitscram ya filthy animal_

He leaps up to reply, then looks back at his dad, who sighs.

‘You’re popular, aren’t you? Good to see you’re fitting in well in Britain, though.’ He ruffles Phichit’s hair fondly.

‘Sorry, dad.’ Phichit combs his fingers through his messy hair sheepishly.

His mum laughs from the kitchen. ‘He’s only joking, Phi, just reply your magic friend! And you,’ she directs this at Phichit’s dad sternly, ‘get in here and help with the dishes.’

He sighs. ‘Yes, ma’am.’

 _merry shitscram!!_ Phichit types.

Usually, Viktor pops online to reply all of his messages at once and then proceeds to ignore his phone for the next two hours. This time, Viktor’s actually online, so he replies immediately. _How’s the haul?_

 _it good!_ Phichit takes a photo of the selfie stick and sends it over.

 _Nice_ is Viktor’s eloquent reply.

_how’s the giacometti party? any booze? hexes? death eaters?_

Viktor sends a photo. Phichit zooms in. It looks like he’s alone in a dark aquarium.

_where dat_

_Slytherin common room. Not very festive, I know_

Phichit frowns. _i thought u were gonna spend it at Chris’???_

Viktor’s reply comes quickly, as if he hadn’t given it much thought.

_His parents don’t rly like muggles haha_

Phichit stares at his screen, feeling as if a British winter had settled in his chest. Viktor must’ve realised that Phichit’s caught off-guard, because he’s typing and—

_Also I forgot to pass you your present so just pop by the common room sometime_

Phichit’s fingers type automatically, _deliver it to my house dressed in a santa outfit and i’ll put you on my Instagram_

_I’m already on your instagram_

Viktor rarely double texts, so it’s a surprise when he follows up with _I don’t even think there’s Floo powder lying around anywhere_

_i don’t even have a fireplace lmao_

_Well I don’t have an owl so get your butt over_

_i would if I could_

Phichit genuinely means it.

 _Actually no don’t I think chris might actually stab you_ _I’ll go over to your place instead ;)_

Phichit also genuinely wants to smack Viktor in the face sometimes.

\--

‘—and that,’ Phichit declares, slapping down the last of his so-called “damning evidence,” ‘is exactly why you need to do something about it.’

Yuuri groans. He can feel a Phichit-induced headache coming on. ‘Do I want to know why you know where exactly Viktor is at any time of the day?’

‘I have my sources.’ Phichit waggles his eyebrows.

Yuuri decides not to think too hard about it and instead, continues attacking his Transfiguration essay. ‘I was planning on inviting him to my place anyway,’ he mumbles, as if hoping Phichit can’t hear him.

It’s a lost case.

Phichit blubbers. ‘Oh my gosh, he’s meeting the family already, I need to get my camera—’

Yuuri tries not to bury his face in his hands. He fails spectacularly. ‘Phichit no—’

‘Phichit _yes_!’

‘I don’t even know if he wants to come over!’ Yuuri yells frantically, trying to clamp a hand over Phichit’s mouth before they get mauled by Viktor’s fangirls.

Phichit bats Yuuri’s hands away easily. ‘Of course he does! You’re like, best friends!’

‘Chris is his best friend.’ Yuuri absentmindedly crosses out a whole paragraph. He thinks he might’ve written the word “hamster” in there somewhere.

‘And he almost went to Chris’s place for Christmas, so he’ll definitely be fine with going to your place for Christmas!’ He hates to admit it, but Phichit has a point.

‘I guess I could ask,’ Yuuri mumbles, if only to get Phichit off his back so he can _finally_ finish his essay without hearing about those hamsters again.

They’re really cute though.

He swears under his breath and crosses out the line about “cute hamsters” Transfiguring themselves into teacups. Phichit laughs at his side the entire time, that fake Hufflepuff.

\--

‘Christmas at your place?’ Viktor blinks, surprised, as if he hasn’t already turned down twenty-three Christmas invitations over the course of three years.

Yuuri shudders to himself. He doesn’t want to know how that number popped into his head. ‘Yeah, my mum tends to cook a little too much so it won’t be any trouble. You’ll have to sleep in my room, though,’ he scratches the back of his head, ‘we don’t really have a guest room.’

‘Sounds nice.’ Viktor smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. ‘I’d like that! I’ve seen Japanese dogeza, but I’ve yet to see Japanese Christmas!’

‘It’s probably not that different from Russian Christmas,’ Yuuri sighs, wrapping his scarf around his neck more tightly. They’re passing through the front lawn on the way to Hogsmeade and it’s _cold_. As usual, Viktor’s only wearing three layers, that monster.

Viktor shrugs, warming his hands in his pockets. ‘We don’t really celebrate Christmas.’

‘Then your birthday?’ Yuuri asks casually.

He doesn’t expect the awkward pause that follows.

When Viktor finally replies, it’s too flat and steady. ‘In Russia, it’s the birthday person that does all the work and invites people to the celebration. I don’t really have the resources to do that kind of thing every year nowadays, so I don’t really celebrate my birthday either.’

Something writhes in Yuuri’s stomach. ‘Oh.’

‘Mm,’ Viktor hums. ‘I still get lots of presents from everyone though, so that’s nice.’ He looks down at the Slytherin scarf adorning his neck, a small smile playing on his lips. It had been a present from Yuuri and Phichit in their second year.

That something writhing in Yuuri’s stomach spurs him on to blurt out, ‘I heard that you were supposed to celebrate with Chris last year?’

Viktor’s still smiling, but there’s a hint of a shadow over his bright blue eyes. ‘Yeah, but it didn’t really work out in the end. It’s fine. Just Slytherin things.’

‘Come over to my place for Christmas break, please. My family’s cool with—well, you know.’ Yuuri doesn’t even know where all this courage is coming from. Maybe his inner Gryffindor is finally showing up. Puberty, man.

Viktor playfully bumps into his side. ‘Of course.’

Yuuri bumps him back.

That’s how they start an inter-House snowball fight in the front lawn of Hogwarts.

At the end of it, Viktor’s red-faced and laughing with a genuine, open smile, and the monster in Yuuri’s stomach purrs.

\--

Three days before Christmas, Yuuri ends up explaining the Floo Network to Viktor.

‘It’s like text messaging, but with human bodies instead of words.’ Yuuri says, scooping up a handful of powder.

Viktor looks queasy. ‘What kind of macabre analogy is that?’ he demands.

Yuuri laughs. ‘Anyway, since it’s your first time you can just hold on to me. It’s easier than searching for you after you get lost.’

They’ve sent all their bags ahead so all that’s left is for them to queue for the Hogwarts fireplaces. Viktor had been disappointed that they weren’t going to Japan, but Yuuri’s promise of an “authentically Japanese” Christmas had been enough to bring back his heart-shaped smile.

In what feels like mere seconds, they’ve gone from being at the back of the queue to stumbling out of the Katsuki home’s fireplace.

It’s a small cottage located somewhere in the suburbs, and the first thing Viktor notes is that it feels like he’s stepped into a piece of Japan transplanted in the middle of England. The décor is minimal and the furniture is simple wood and stone. It feels calm.

‘Yuuri! Is this Viktor? You didn’t tell me he was such a handsome young man!’ a plump woman gushes in Japanese, waving her wand and directing some brushes to dust the soot off their bodies.

‘ _Mum_ ,’ Yuuri hisses back. Viktor’s glad he picked up enough of the basics to make out their ensuing conversation.

‘Is this the nice young man you’ve been telling us about?’ Mama Katsuki smiles. ‘He’s awfully skinny! So it’s true that Seekers have high—’ and here Viktor doesn’t recognise the word, but Mama Katsuki ends her sentence with a sunny smile and a genial ‘–huh.’

Viktor bows, like he’s seen Yuuri do to some of the professors and seniors. ‘Hello! Thank you for having me over!’ he glows at her with a heart-shaped smile.

‘Oh, it’s no problem at all!’ To Viktor’s surprise, she speaks English with barely any hint of an accent. ‘Yuuri was telling us how you’re always spending Christmas by yourself, and our house is always open for Yuuri’s favourite friends! Feel free to make yourself at home!’

The truth hardly hurts coming from Mama Katsuki’s mouth. Before Viktor can even marvel at that, he’s being dragged into a room by Yuuri.

‘Let him settle in first, mum!’ Yuuri yells, glowing bright red.

‘Oh, all right then! I’ll go prepare dinner.’ She happily prances into another room, presumably the kitchen.

‘I love your family,’ Viktor gushes, wrapping his arms around Yuuri gleefully. ‘This is already the best Christmas I’ve ever had, and it’s not even Christmas yet—’

Yuuri hugs Viktor back. Today’s full of surprises. ‘I’m glad you’re enjoying it,’ he mumbles into Viktor’s ear, then he lets go.

Viktor can still feel the ghost of Yuuri’s warm breath hovering against his ear.

A door inches opens across the hallway, and a sleepy-looking older girl stumbles out. Her eyes widen when she sees Viktor.

‘Nikiforov?’ she yells, scrambling back into her room.

Viktor blinks.

She re-emerges with her phone. ‘Take a photo with me! Please!’ she begs.

‘Mari, what even—’

‘I didn’t realise you were serious when you said you were bringing him home!’ Mari says excitedly. ‘He’s adorable up close! I can make some serious money from these photos.’

‘Are you selling them to _Phichit_?’ Yuuri demands.

Mari scoffs and brushes imaginary dust off her shoulders. ‘I have a large clientele.’

Viktor notes the Gryffindor scarf wrapped around her neck and smiles happily. Yuuri had been adamant about him not meeting his sister for the past four years. He claimed it would be “too embarrassing.” So she _was_ a Gryffindor, just like Yuuri.

‘Okay! Cheese!’ he poses.

They end up taking a few shots together, and Mama Katsuki joins in at some point, spatula still in hand. It turns out that the entire Katsuki family is ridiculously photogenic, so it’s hard to pick the best photo. Mari ends up sending everything to a ‘Katsuki-Nikiforov’ group chat.

 _Christmas with the fam!_ Viktor captions one of the most adorable photos he has, with him surrounded by all three Katsukis, and posts it onto his Instagram.

When it blows up, he finds that he doesn’t even care.

\--

On Christmas eve, he gets Yuuri out of the house.

‘Let’s go, I wanna go Muggle window-shopping,’ he mumbles into Yuuri’s back. On the very first night, Viktor had wheedled his way into Yuuri’s bed as a living heater. Yuuri’s initial resistance had melted away in the face of a very warm sleep.

‘Mmkay, five more minutes,’ Yuuri mumbles back, burrowing into his pillow.

Viktor relents and curls up too, an arm draped over Yuuri’s side.

They end up leaving the house only at noon.

‘I’m going out!’ Yuuri yells.

Mama Katsuki’s voice floats in from the general direction of the kitchen. ‘Okay! Be back by five, if you can!’

‘Got it!’ Viktor replies for Yuuri, who’s busy struggling to lace his shoes while buckling his belt.

The bus ride into the city is pleasant and long. At some point, Yuuri falls asleep on Viktor’s shoulder. He looks peaceful, Viktor thinks, staring at his dark eyelashes.

He closes his eyes and locks away the memory in a safe corner of his mind, in a place that’s filled with strange, wing-like things.

The bus pulls in at the city centre, which is buzzing with families and couples and friends hanging out on the eve.

When they alight, Viktor immediately makes a beeline for the life-sized displays. ‘The decorations this year are so pretty! Help me take a photo!’ Viktor poses in front of a gingerbread man and tosses his phone at Yuuri, who barely manages to catch it.

‘Okay, okay, one, two—’ Viktor hears a shutter go off, then a loud rumble.

‘Oh, right, we haven’t eaten today,’ he remembers. ‘What do you want for lunch?’

Yuuri stares at Viktor for a while, then shakes his head. ‘I want to try… fast food? Is that what you call it?’

Viktor grins. That’s definitely within his budget. ‘Your wish is my command.’

\--

Yuuri isn’t sure what he expected.

‘What’s the big deal,’ he mumbles around his mouthful of pizza.

He pointedly ignores the monster in his stomach screaming about the potential connotations of Viktor asking him out on Christmas eve. The Russian probably has no idea about actual Japanese culture.

Viktor shrugs, folding his arms on the table. ‘I don’t know, Phichit probably hyped it up too much since he likes it a lot. I think it tastes fine, nothing special.’

‘Yurio loves this stuff too,’ Yuuri crinkles his nose, ‘but it’s just… food.’

‘It’s pretty cheap and affordable and it’s edible, so I guess there’s that.’ Viktor reaches out and pulls out a slice of pizza, promptly chomping down half of it in one bite.

Yuuri stares.

‘How are you still so skinny?’ he grumbles.

‘I’m a young growing child.’ Viktor smiles impishly, then polishes off the rest of the slice. ‘Can I have one of yours?’

‘Yeah, sure, I need to save space for dinner anyway.’ Yuuri nudges the last slice toward Viktor. He’s surprisingly full after just two.

Yuuri looks around. The fast food joint kind of reminds him of the Gryffindor common room. It’s filled with noisy families and friend groups, and there’s red everywhere.

When he remarks on that, Viktor laughs. It’s a pleasant sound. ‘Red makes you hungrier,’ he explains, ‘it’s Muggle psychology. You spend more money on food, apparently.’

‘Maybe that’s why we’re always hungry,’ Yuuri muses. ‘What about green?’

‘Green is calming,’ Viktor says as he cleans off his fingers with a napkin. He downs the remaining water in his glass, then continues, ‘it helps with mood and apparently restores you to your “natural state” or something.’

‘And yet Slytherins are so grumpy.’ Yuuri realises his mistake too late.

‘We have reason to be,’ Viktor agrees delicately. ‘After all, we could be much grumpier.’

Yuuri immediately drops the subject. ‘Thanks for lunch,’ he says instead. He’s still embarrassed that he hadn’t thought of bringing Muggle money.

‘It’s nothing! I owe you so much more for your hospitality,’ Viktor laughs. ‘Your mum is really cool.’

‘She likes you too. I think she and dad are this close to adopting you.’ Yuuri positions his thumb and index finger millimetres apart.

‘I wouldn’t mind. Your house is so cosy! And I could eat that katsudon all day,’ Viktor sighs dreamily, his hands cradling his cheeks.

Yuuri does his best not to think of that possible future. ‘You can learn how to make it on your own. I think Yurio’s trying to reverse-engineer his grandpa’s katsudon pirozhki recipe.’

‘Maybe I’ll sneak in to the kitchens with him sometime. Anyway, I wanna check out the Christmas market out there.’ Viktor gestures outside the window. When Yuuri peers out, he can see the vague outline of pushcarts and small stores gathered in a town square.

‘Oh, it looks cool. Let’s go.’ When he gets up, he reaches out to grab Viktor’s wrist, but the Slytherin ends up linking their fingers.

They’re holding hands.

It’s such a Viktor thing to do that Yuuri just rolls his eyes and yanks him out the door. ‘C’mon, it’s getting colder, I don’t want to freeze to death.’

Viktor seems a little _too_ eager to follow. ‘I see a hot cocoa stall! Do you want to share?’

Yuuri peers at the prices. ‘It’s like six quid.’

‘That means it’s hipster. Which means it’s good.’

Yuuri is sufficiently acquainted with Muggle terms to understand that Viktor is talking about a trend and not a body part. ‘Yeah, but it’s like, _six quid_.’

‘It’s Christmas! It’s fine,’ Viktor waves him off. Minutes later, there’s a steaming hot cup of cocoa in Yuuri’s hands.

A part of him is glad that Viktor bought it, because it’s so delightfully warm. Yuuri lifts the cup to his lips and takes a cautious sip. Liquid warmth blooms in his mouth and trickles down to his stomach, spreading throughout his body from there.

Viktor is watching him carefully, he realises.

‘It’s so good,’ he swoons. Before he knows it, a quarter of the large cup of cocoa is warming up his stomach.

‘Worth six quid?’ Viktor teases, slipping his hand into Yuuri’s once more.

Yuuri sighs contentedly in response.

They stroll around the Christmas market like that. Viktor makes a stop at a stall selling cute cat merchandise and buys a pair of gloves for Chris. To be honest, Yuuri can’t imagine the scowling Slytherin wearing a pair of white paw-like gloves, but when Viktor makes up his mind, there’s little anyone can do to stop him.

Yuuri ogles a stall selling art prints and post cards and photography. They have a huge corkboard with the works on display, the clean, minimalist layout complementing quietly dynamic artworks and serene photographs.

Viktor buys him two prints and a post card without even batting an eyelash.

When Yuuri tries to protest, Viktor overrides him with a loud ‘It’s Christmas!’ and a beaming heart-shaped smile. He can’t win, Yuuri admits miserably.

At some point, Viktor complains about his chapped lips and Yuuri hands over his lip balm. While he’s applying it, Yuuri tilts the cup over and gulps down the last dregs of the hot cocoa.

He stares at the cup for a while. Then it hits him. ‘Oh, I’m so sorry, I finished it all—’

‘It’s fine,’ Viktor smiles. Yuuri recognises that smile. It’s the Slytherin Smile.

Part of him wants to back away, but Viktor pulls him in and leans forward, resting his forehead against Yuuri’s. His blue eyes are looking at Yuuri with such warmth that Yuuri feels his face starting to burn.

Viktor lifts his hand to cup one side of Yuuri’s face. He stares at his lips.

‘I’ll just help myself, then,’ he whispers, then there’s soft fingertips pressing against Yuuri’s lips, running over them and sending sparks through his system.

Yuuri forgets how to breathe.

Viktor pulls away, bringing that hand to his own mouth, past slightly parted lips shiny with Yuuri’s own lip balm. Yuuri watches, transfixed, as Viktor’s tongue and lips gently work the cocoa off his fingers.

It would be _great_ if he could just melt into the floor and disappear right now.

‘Definitely worth six quid,’ Viktor says, smiling with such deceptive sweetness at Yuuri’s hammering heart.

And then he checks his phone, shattering the Slytherin Viktor Effect when he swears under his breath.

‘We’re gonna be late, move, move, _move_ —’ Viktor hisses, almost dragging Yuuri toward the bus depot.

Still dazed, Yuuri stares at their intertwined fingers. The hot cocoa sits warm in his stomach.

\--

To Viktor’s relief, they make it back to the bus stop in the suburbs with minutes to spare.

‘I can’t disappoint Mama Katsuki!’ he insists, jogging down the street to the Katsuki doorstep.

Yuuri follows some distance behind at a more reasonable pace. ‘I told you, it’ll be fine! Mum wouldn’t mind. Besides, you’d just be recruited to help with the cooking—’

Viktor starts to _sprint_.

Yuuri can’t stop his laughter as he runs to catch up, his breath fogging up in the cold. ‘You’re going the wrong way!’

Luckily, Viktor is easy to keep an eye on, his bright hair shining in the evening light, so they crash into the Katsuki home without any more misadventures. Viktor kicks off his shoes with enough fervour to send one flying out the door.

‘Mama Katsuki—’ he sings, disappearing into the kitchen.

Yuuri contemplates leaving Viktor’s sole shoe out in the cold, then sighs and trudges back out.

The snow comes down like slow, gentle rain, dusting the dark green trees in the yard like the finest layer of icing. Viktor’s black sneaker sticks out in the frost, an eyesore in the otherwise serene landscape.

With a shake of his head, Yuuri bends down and retrieves the shoe, turning back to the small cottage. In one of the windows, he can see Viktor smiling as he says something to Yuuri’s mum. Yuuri chuckles when his mum pats Viktor’s head. In the warmth of the kitchen, the Slytherin’s blush is even more pronounced.

He wonders if Viktor’s ever had a Christmas like this.

Mari pokes her head out the doorway and yells, ‘Did he kick it into the pond or something? Hurry up, it’s getting cold in here!’

‘Coming!’ Yuuri yells back.

Mari makes a disgruntled noise when he finally reaches the warmth of the cottage and slams the door shut behind him.

He arranges the shoes neatly by the door, then immediately camps himself in front of the fireplace. His eyes start to close of their own accord.

His sister interrupts his pleasant winter evening by prodding him from behind. ‘So, Christmas eve, huh?’ she mutters.

Yuuri slumps his shoulders and opens his eyes blearily. ‘It’s not like that,’ he groans. ‘He doesn’t know.’

‘If you ate fried chicken, it was totally a date.’ The latter part is said in Japanese.

Yuuri hides himself by pulling his coat over his head. ‘We had pizza. Bugger off.’

He’s suddenly yanked backward by the shoulder. Mari is almost uncomfortably close when she quietly says, ‘This kind of thing is fine, you know?’

‘Of course I know,’ Yuuri snaps, ‘but that doesn’t change the fact that we just hung out, that’s all.’

Just like that, Mari pulls away. Yuuri doesn’t understand his sister sometimes.

‘Just wanted you to know, that’s all.’

He doesn’t know what to reply, so he just watches her languidly stroll into the kitchen.

\--

It’s hilarious to see Viktor spend the whole of Christmas dinner blubbering incoherently in Russian.

‘What’s he saying?’ Mari mumbles, elbowing Yuuri. She’s staring at him like he’s grown an extra head.

Yuuri snorts. ‘Something about how it’s delicious and really good, I think.’

His parents apparently find Viktor adorable nonetheless, because they keep on piling more and more Christmas chicken into his plate.

‘Make sure to save some space for the cake,’ his dad reminds Viktor, but his mum just keeps pulling chicken out of the seemingly bottomless bucket.

‘Oh yes! The Christmas cake looked so good! I wish I could bake like that,’ Viktor sighs in English.

In that moment, the Katsukis at the table side eye each other. Mari is smirking. Everything’s proceeding according to plan.

Yuuri’s mum laughs delightedly, pressing her hands to her cheeks in embarrassment. ‘Oh, it’s nothing! Just a simple recipe is all. I could teach you how to cook something over the next few days if you’d like!’

Viktor lapses into grateful Russian again. His mouth seems to have permanently stretched into a heart-shaped smile.

‘What’s he saying now?’

‘I think I heard him mention Chris and Yurio at some point, so he’s probably gonna try feeding them or something,’ Yuuri mumbles around his mouthful of chicken.

Mari filches a generous portion of chicken skin from his plate. ‘Nice. So he’s pretty _and_ he can cook.’

‘I’m pretty sure he can’t cook to save—’

‘Yuuri!’ his dad interrupts cheerfully, then proceeds to speak in Japanese. ‘Can you come here and help me bring out the cake?’

Yuuri bites his tongue. ‘Oh, sure! Be right there!’

As he makes his way past Mari, into the kitchen, his sister snickers. ‘I bet you two Sickles Nikiforov’s hair is whiter than the cake.’

Yuuri makes a mental note to claim his winnings later.

In the kitchen, he finds his dad staring at a packet of candles. ‘How old is that boy again?’

‘Fifteen, dad. Same as me.’

‘Thought he’d be older,’ his dad admits with a chuckle. ‘Westerners really are tall, huh.’

‘I think it’s just him,’ Yuuri sighs. Viktor’s already taller than him. Skinnier, too.

With a wave of his wand, his dad lights the candles and presents the cake to Yuuri with a wide smile. ‘Go on, bring it out for your friend.’

Yuuri takes a deep breath and steels himself for Viktor’s reaction.

For some reason, he really wants him to like it.

As he approaches the threshold, he sees his family excitedly gossiping at the dinner table. Viktor’s facing away from the kitchen, just as planned, but he’s bent over giggling, his face in his hands. Yuuri’s almost certain that they’re laying bare his embarrassing baby stories. He makes eye contact with his sis and mum, and on that cue, they launch into the birthday song. He can hear his dad singing from behind him, too.

Viktor turns slowly, eyes wide in disbelief. For a fleeting moment, his smile seems sorrowful, but in the blink of an eye everything is washed away in a wave of pure, unmasked joy.

Yuuri smiles.

That’s the Viktor he loves.

‘Happy birthday, Viktor!’

\--

_happy birthday and merry christmas! did you like your present ;3c_

A pause, then slow typing.

_Did you do what I think you did_

The reply comes quick, as if everything had been orchestrated from the start.

_mebbe ;3c you dragged him out of the house on xmas eve right?_

A groan.

_GDI phichu what did you do_

There’s a small smile tugging on the corner of his lips, though.

_did you mean: phichu u da mvp_

The smile widens.

_You’re secretly a slytherin, aren’t you_

 

 

_funny you should say that, i’ve thought the same about yuuri too_

**Author's Note:**

> References:  
> Thxng, Ngein, Brnxs (gold, silver, bronze) – the episode 11 “phichit’s shoulders are a podium” tumblr meta post  
> Merry shitscram – apparently the latest Christmas meme  
> Merry (Christmas) ya filthy animal – Home Alone  
> Wing-like things – part 2 of the hogwash AU (if these wings could fly)  
> Christmas eve – usually, couples spend christmas eve together in Japan  
> Christmas chicken – Japanese people apparently love their KFC during Christmas
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/_antikytheras)


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